Adoption

I think about all the joys and challenges that surround the word of adoption and it is so full of prayer possibilities. I am sure we all know at least one family impacted by adoption in some way. Lift them up in prayer because there are times when it takes a lifetime to process the impact of adoption. Whether they are going through a time of discouragement or a time of celebration, pray God reveals His loving care to them each step of the way and pray they can recognize His work in their lives.

Here are some ideas to get you started if you are drawing a blank:

the adopted
the birth mother
the birth father
the birth grandparents
the adopting family (parents, other children, grandparents)
the challenges (and joys) of international adoption
Adoptions involving disabilities

There are so many adjustments, expectations, joys, waits, and hurts that those in any of the above categories experience through the process of adoption. Take time to pray for and encourage those you know who have an experience relating to adoption in their lives.

Are You Stuck in a Bad Chapter?

Ever wonder how King David from the Old Testament (shepherd boy, giant slayer, and man after God’s own heart) could possibly walk so close with God and then end up so far away from God by committing adultery, murder, and failing to protect his family? It happened just one step at a time. An unchecked heart and unconfessed sin can lead both you and I astray very quickly. David’s story didn’t end there…and ours doesn’t need to either….

Sometimes we think receiving faith in Jesus as Savior eliminates all of our temptations and rebellious, sinful decisions. It isn’t true, but it sure would be nice. We do, however, get to experience the nudging of our conscience from the Holy Spirit. You and I can try to stifle and smother those promptings and go our own wanton way for a long, long time but the consequences will catch up to us eventually.

Don’t try to still the small voice of God. Confessing your sin will be a turning point in a difficult chapter of your life. Consequences won’t likely be eliminated but God can and will grow you in His love and grace.

God can redeem all situations and longs to be reconciled with you!

What is in Your Food?

It’s the talk these days, you know. Pink slime and GMO’s and pesticides. It is overwhelming to watch the videos and read the books but I do what I can. It is important. Not all food is created equal. The healthiest food has the least processing, the fewest additives, and is organic. More fruits and veggies and legumes, please. I like my grains processed as little as possible. Fast food is something to stay away from, even though it’s cheap and puts something in a hungry belly.

And so it is with religious institutions. Even Christian ones. Are you in a place where, as God’s Word is preached, it is infused with man-made additives that distract and pollute? Are you finding the lists of things to stay away from are longer than the lists of things we are called to do? Are you being taught things that might seem reasonable but aren’t actually biblical?

Take a look at your spiritual food supply. Is someone trying to control yours? It is important that you question when things are presented as God’s law but truly are not. Ask questions, seek counsel from others, and do not simply surround yourself with people all taught by the same human authority figure. This isn’t easy, but if you are so involved in a “like-minded” group that no one is in a position to discern a problem, it is important to step out and ask trustworthy others about your concerns.

Regular food is important. Spiritual food is important. If someone is messing with your food, you need to address it. Don’t blindly trust the USDA, the FDA, or some person in position of authority who does not allow himself or herself be accountable to others. If you know of people caught up in this sort of situation, pray for them. Pray for God and His pure and unadulterated Truth to reach them. And if they come knocking on your door for insight, show them the pure Gospel.

Control

Can we ever get all of it under control? I don’t think it is possible. I don’t think it is meant to be possible. While this might be a disappointing piece of news for you, it is a relief to me!!!

Glance over this list…surely there is something out of your control here:

Budget, Children, Paperwork, Relationships, Health, Laundry, Kitchen Cupboards, Refrigerator, Food Shopping and Meal Planning, Chores,  Vehicle Maintenance, Home Maintenance

Really? shall I continue?

Family Schedules, Education, Smoking, Drinking, Recreational Drug Use, Weight, Eating, Exercise, Thought Life, Spiritual Life, Emotional Life, Addictive Behaviors, Marriage

I know there is more… 

What is our obsession with control? Sometimes our personal lack of control is seen in our need to control others. Sometimes we are just weighed down by the expectations of others and so we work hard to “earn” someone’s favor by being “in control”. There are things that are simply out of our control and there are things we certainly can work on. If I am always angry about how things are going, I am likely feeling out of control and not sure where to put that frustration and so it comes out as anger. It’s somewhat understanding because feeling like everything is out of control is a very frustrating feeling!

Here is my confession ~ At one time or another I have tried to get all of those things listed above under my control. Guess what? It hasn’t worked yet. I can make progress in some areas but I just can’t seem to conquer everything on that list and certainly not at the same time. I am actually not sure I have conquered anything of that list. All I will say is that sometimes I make progress.

I am not sure why I expect myself to have everything under control. I guess because lots of people look like they have it under control but they I suspect they don’t. It’s most likely a mirage. It just appears to be the case. It is probably what people want me to think is true.

Me? I am a mess some days. Maybe most days. And when I acknowledge that life is messy and I am messy and I ask God to work through my circumstances for something bigger than myself (like Him) He is able to take my mess and makes a message out of it. I hope it is a message of grace because that is what I need to hear and so I am betting others need to hear it too.

Let’s be real and admit where we have a struggle, an unrealistic expectation, or a mess. Trying to look like we have everything under control isn’t healthy for others and it isn’t healthy for us either. While everyone does not need to know everything, confessing our lack of control to those we rub shoulders with most frequently is being real. I think when we are real with others it invites them to be real with us. And that is where we start to accept who we are instead of always striving to be someone we aren’t.

Lord, within my mess I need to see Your message. Help me to bring all of it to You and accept Your grace, mercy, and forgiveness. Amen.

Children, Parenting, and Pride

Do you know or parent a child who is very compliant?

NEWSFLASH: It’s most likely a personality trait. Your awesome parenting did not create a compliant child.

Do you know or parent a child who is strong willed and likes to buck at every turn?

NEWSFLASH: That is also mostly a personality trait. Your parental mistakes (and friends, we ALL make loads of them) did not create a child who insists on blazing their own trail!

Do your remember Adam and Eve? Created by a perfect God, living in a sinless world, and no “good” excuse for their choices. Even they did not follow God’s directions!!!

NEWSFLASH: You will never be a more perfect parent than God!

If your kids are compliant (or obedient) most of the time, don’t take the credit for it. Compliance is most often a God-given personality trait.

Don’t be prideful in your parenting. You can learn all you can and do the best you can but don’t put your kids and their behavior on a pedestal. Whenever you see kids put on a pedestal, it is because the parents want to be on the pedestal but this is a more accepted way of getting the accolades. I think we can all agree though, it is obnoxious and exhausting to be friends with people who always need to talk about the amazing things their children accomplish. By the same token, there is no need to humiliate and shame your children for mistakes. Quite honestly, there are a ton of natural consequences that come with risky behavior, even some that we have to live with. While we would like children to learn these hard lessons sooner rather than later and with as little pain and embarrassment as possible, sometimes it takes a lifetime of learning. They will learn as they grow. We all do.

“Pride attaches undue importance to the superiority of one’s status in the eyes of others; And shame is fear of humiliation at one’s inferior status in the estimation of others. When one sets his heart on being highly esteemed, and achieves such rating, then he is automatically involved in fear of losing his status.” Lao-Tzu

While I am not a big fan of Lao-Tzu, there is some great insight in that quote. Pride and fear are very interconnected. Pride can mess up quite a bit of stuff. I have seen it cripple people, families, congregations, and ministries. Be careful! It can creep up on you. If you consider yourself above accountability, then you have some issues with pride. If you do not ask for accountability and allow people to hold you accountable for what you do and say, then be ready for that ugly day when it all comes crashing down. It is important to take this issue of pride seriously. It is often something we can see in others more quickly than we can see it in ourselves. Ask God to reveal your areas of pride. Take the risk and ask an honest friend too.

Every time I land in Proverbs I am reminded that I need to spend more time there:

Pride goes before destruction,
a haughty spirit before a fall.
Better to be lowly in spirit along with the oppressed
than to share plunder with the proud.
[Proverbs 16:18-19]

Lord, You know me inside and out. You created me. You love me. You desire for me to learn and grow. Pride is not a part of what You desire for me. Bring me to a greater place of dependency on You. When You see pride in me, You also see fear. Replace that fear with trust in You. Let me be real, accessible, and accountable. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Busy Days

Got a long list and a short amount of minutes to accomplish the task?

That is my life today!!!

But it isn’t too busy a day to praise God for the sunshine, His love, His grace, His mercy, And His forgiveness! Even on one of those crazy days there is time for praise!!!

Quick–what are 5 things you are thankful for today? It is important that we notice and give thanks, even on a busy day!

Seasons….of Vulnerability

The very young, the elderly, and the infirm are the ones I think of first when I think of vulnerability. They each are dependent for someone else looking out for their needs and protecting them from dangerous situations. Or when people are battling illness–they are susceptible to other infections and their resistance is down. For some, it is the difference between life and death if they are exposed to the wrong germ.

But there are many other ways to be vulnerable and it seems for every vulnerability there is a predator looking for someone in a tender spot, accessible and with lowered defenses:

a lonely child
those struggling with depression
a widow or widower making sense of their new life
parents who have a child with a disability
anyone walking through a season of grieving
a motherless or fatherless child seeing a role model
anyone walking through a season of extended illness
a recent immigrant with limited language skills
those recently released from prison
a single parent looking for parenting help
those recently returning from active duty in our military

Looking back on your life you may be able to clearly see your moments (years?) of vulnerability. Maybe you were vulnerable due to life situations that were out of your control. Maybe you made some choices that left you open to some ugly stuff. Do you see any vulnerable people around you that could use your prayers for protection? An offer of friendship? A cup of coffee and a brainstorming session? Sometimes the vulnerable just need help knowing where to go for resources and sometimes they need a discerning ear to help them navigate through a difficult season. Surely there is someone you know who is struggling and vulnerable who at least needs your prayers!

The devil is a schemer. And we are often too arrogant to think we can fall prey to his antics. Oh, he is clever — using us against ourselves. How can we resist him? By being on our knees and with our nose in The Book. If we are standing on His solid ground then we are in a good position to help someone else get connected with what they need to navigate through this difficult life.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist,with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. [Ephesians 6:10-18]

Seasons….of Perceived Powerlessness

We often think that because we can’t do anything about a situation that we are powerless. It is true, there are some things we cannot fix, predict, or control. And so we are powerless in a sense. We can’t change others. We can’t bring the dead back to life. We can’t heal illness by the power of our minds. We can’t take back our angry words. There is so much we can’t do when it comes to the troubles of this life.

And yet, by surrendering all of these things to God, we acknowledge where the power truly lies. Praying for and with someone or some situation or circumstance is often only what we can do. And yet there is great power in that process of praying.

Recognize Who is in control
Surrender your preconceived notions for the best course of action
Depend on God’s promises
Allow God to change YOU – the only thing that you can truly change
Show mercy and grace
Offer forgiveness
Listen to the needs of others
Dig deep into God’s Word
Renew your mind with His Word

Don’t let your circumstances psych you out! You aren’t ever truly powerless with God. There are things you can do. Depend on God and not on your own understanding

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. [Romans 12:1-3]

Seasons…of Disobedience

Have you ever had a season of disobedience? Sometimes those “seasons” go on for years! Pure selfishness typically characterizes the attitudes and actions during this time. Oh, and the sowing of seeds of future challenges! It’s like you are taking musk thistle seeds and burying them all around you to ensure you have some life long challenges with deep and difficult roots. Oh the crazy things we do!

I am in the middle of Beth Moore’s Bible Study on David. Her studies are very in-depth and thought provoking and I encourage you to explore one if you ever get the chance.

Remember David from Scripture? The shepherd boy, king, adulterer, and author of many Psalms? If you get a chance to survey his life in a study, you should definitely do it. He had an incredibly close relationship with God and then wandered far away. And then he recognized his sin. Fascinating and familiar, all at the same time! Here are a few powerful quotes from the Beth Moore study David: Seeking A Heart Like His (workbook pages 150-159) I have been pondering:

* Most of us have had seasons of unrepentance when we outwardly attempted to go on with life as if we had not sinned against God.
* In the gap between wanting and getting we must flex the muscle of self control to protect ourselves.
* A heart out of God’s hands never fails to fall into danger.
* “All rebellion begins in isolation.”
* Little should frighten us more than realizing the Holy Spirit’s conviction has grown so faint we hardly sense it.
* Intense selfishness accompanies a faraway heart.
* Sometimes the further we wander outside God’s will, the more we judge others and the less we show mercy.

If you sense you are in a season of disobedience, repent and talk to God. If you remember a season of disobedience in your own life, consider what you learned immediately following that time. What steps have you taken to insure that season doesn’t darken your doorstep again?