There are seasons in life where we find ourselves in the shades of death; where trouble or discouragement or illness have surrounded us and we have not felt joy. We are simply sitting in darkness or under the cover cold, dark, and moody clouds of circumstance that drain our ability to smile and laugh.
Honestly, that feels like a typical February for me. I hate not seeing or feeling the sun. Day after day it is gloomy but when there is a moment — even just a sunny hour or the thrill of a sunny day. My goodness. It is so exciting!
Sometimes my soul gets trapped under the weight of discouragement, doubt, and distortions of reality. It needs to be in the presence of the Son — to feel the warmth and encouragement and to feel the Life only Jesus can bring to us.
After sitting in darkness, it takes time to readjust. The light can be bright. Sometimes even overwhelming for eyes that have not been exposed to it recently. Go slowly. Practice absorbing the light.
Heavenly Father, Bring Your light to me. Let it shine in the dark places and bring life to where there seems to be only shades of death. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
“The People That in Darkness Sat”
The people that in darkness sat
A glorious light have seen;
The light has shined on them who long
In shades of death have been.
To hail Thee, Sun of Righteousness,
The gathering nations come;
They joy as when the reapers bear
Their harvest treasures home.
For Thou their burden dost remove
And break the tyrant’s rod
As in the day when Midian fell
Before the sword of God.
To us a Child of hope is born,
To us a Son is given,
And on His shoulder ever rests
All power in earth and heaven.
His name shall be the Prince of Peace,
The Everlasting Lord,
The Wonderful, the Counselor.
The God by all adored.
His righteous government and power
Shall over all extend;
On judgment and on justice based,
His reign shall have no end.
Lord Jesus, reign in us, we pray,
And make us Thine alone,
Who with the Father ever art
And Holy Spirit, one.
by John Morison, 1749-1798
prayerpointsbyliz 
The year 2018 was marked by four deaths in my family and three friends. I was with three when they died, one was farther North, one friend had end stage Parkinson’s disease then suffered a massive Cerebral vascular Accident (stroke) that left her unresponsive, one friend had a massive Acute Myocardial Infarction (heart attack) that was instantly fatal , then her husband commited suicide shortly afterward. It was a year of shock, sorrow, grief. then my beloved horse, Shane, began to lose massive amounts of weight, either a sign of end stage disease, or a need to change his diet,I was devestated to begin with , so my ability to think was on hold. It turned out to be a change in diet, confirmed by his vet. Also confirmed by his vet that I was not in my right mind, strangely he was the only person who recognized this. adept at diagnosing without knowing all the details, horses only “talk” to their person (yes, we communicate) Dr Wan diagnosed Shane with needing a new diet and me with potentially “Broken Heart Syndrome”. His advice go on “automatic pilot” and focus inward through prayer ,meditation and ignore the rest of the world. His advice was reconfirmed by my doctor. What a strange 2019 , I feel the year was lost, but my family members have gone home to be with the Lord, my friends too, so they are not lost. I held onto many passages from the Bible , especially “To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under Heaven.” 2018 I grieved, 2019 was ” automatic pilot “year. It was time to let my heart go back to normal, physically and emotionally. It takes time, grief has devastating affects that aren’t recognized until you fee,like the world is a pool of cement sucking you down. Fortunately my doctor didn’t prescribe anti depressants, I would have refused them anyway, grief is something you have to let your mind resolve. Broken heart Syndrome is a real medical diagnosis, it comes after tremendous or repeated grief episodes, usually it fades with time. Being close to a pet, no matter what the size, is now recognized as a family member, yes horses communicate with their person, by vocal sounds, body language, Shane knows what I am thinking and vice versa, I can’t explain it but veterinarians all know this. the year 2020,I tell people is the year when my life comes back into focus, when asked how I simply tell them I asked my Creator, He always knows what to do, my Guardian Angel worked overtime. All the best. have a wonderful trip back home to Hungary.
Oh Christine! What a series of heartaches! Compounding grief is definitely debilitating!