I am impatient

I am impatient in a variety of ways. When I am in learning mode, I don’t like to be rushed, so I need to be more mindful and be a loving friend, cheering someone on and not be that person who is hassling someone while they are “in process”. I am not always able to let others discover what they need to discover and give them the time and space to do that. While I do think we are in one another’s lives to help and encourage, there is a balance about how far that goes. And, I might need to be a better friend to myself and not hassle myself when it is taking me a while to learn something.

I know it is dangerous to ask God for patience. This life is a marathon, not a sprint. And I am thankful for the slow lessons along the way. You know, those lessons you can feel deep in your bones because you have lived them through the years. They are a part of your core.

Maybe, a part of my impatience is that I want to get to the other side of the situation. If I can’t go around it, I want to come through it as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, there are a lot of things that aren’t quickly moved through.

Think of an amazing meal — there is usually a lot of time that goes into the gathering and preparation of the food. It might marinate for days. It might cook all day on the stove. Getting all the elements together to be ready to be served at the same time really is an art. Pair it with some tableware, delightful company, and a nice wine and it is more of an experience. These things take time. Relationships take time. Epiphanies take time.

I am trying to be more mindful of process. My confession is that I am impatient. I know God forgives my impatience. And I know that he is growing me in this area. As usual, some days it clicks more than others.