Measuring Success

When you look at anything — a goal, a project, a life — there are so many different ways to measure success.

This year, I am reading through the Bible. My goal is to do it in 365 days. I would have liked to have said I have been “faithful” every day but I have already had some days I didn’t do it. I got caught up. Does that count as success?

I am still on the course so we will see how it ends up.

But, what if it takes me 370 days to do this instead of 365? Have I failed?

What is my goal? What am I measuring?

Am I using the right tool?

Measuring success for a timid toddler who needs to practice walking is getting back up again, after a fall — not perfect walking. At least, not yet.

Measuring success for someone who has been waylaid by serious illness or an accident might be to be able to feed themselves again and keep working towards independence.

Measuring success might be when your independent strivings cease and you are willing to be vulnerable and accept help from someone.

What is “success” in God’s eyes? Does He even measure that?

Sometimes we don’t exactly know what success will look like because it isn’t always easily measured. It can be about numbers, but it often isn’t.

Is it possible that what we learn while we are on our quest for “success” is more of the point?

Lord, give me a new perspective on success. Let me not be limited by earthly measurements.

Lapse, Relapse, and Setbacks

We’ve had illness at our house since February 1st.

Today is March 16th, and I am ready for a healthy home.

I have a cough that is hanging on a bit. But I really can’t figure out if Don’s illness has morphed from the original or he was on the mend but then had a relapse.

Of course, we won’t ever really know. And it doesn’t much matter. It’s just how it is.

But, it got me thinking about lapses — in judgement.

And relapses — which don’t always involve judgement but sometimes do.

And then, of course, setbacks which cover a wide range of things from mental, physical, spiritual, financial, and more.

They are all interruptions that take you off the path you had hoped or planned to be on. And they can be frustrating.

But, there is also some learning that can happen in those times as well. Are you teachable? Are you curious? Would you like to figure out how to get closer to solving that persistent problem?

And, possibly, is this that “thorn in your flesh” that I suspect we all have? The Apostle Paul talks about his in 2 Corinthians:

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. [2 Corinthians 12:7-10 NIV]

We are living on an Earth riddled by sin. And our sin contributes to it as well. What if this thorn in the flesh is actually something for our good — to keep us tethered to God and dependent on Him for our every day? At the very least it can be something used for our good, by God.

I am not a theologian. But I know God loves me. And I trust His work in my life.

Sometimes I cause my own grief and sometimes difficulties are thrust upon me. I lapse and relapse. I have and will continue to experience setbacks in all the ways.

But, I am confident in God’s work in and through it all. I pray you are as well!

His grace is sufficient for you, for His power is made perfect in weakness!

Cynics, Skeptics, and Discernment

A cynic is a person who habitually expects things to go wrong, or questions the value or worth of things; a person with a negative, pessimistic, or mistrustful outlook. [oed.com]

A skeptic is a person who doesn’t believe something is true unless they see evidence. Skeptics are doubters — they need to see proof before they will believe. [vocabulary.com]

A jaded person has seen enough of a particular situation to know when to move on and try to find something better, a cynic just has an underlying distrust of everything and therefore will not find anything better.

Discernment is the ability to tell things apart—to separate them, even when they appear to be very similar. People with discernment are able to make keen observations about things. Discernment is often thought to be an ability of those with wisdom or experience. It often involves making a judgment, especially about things that aren’t obvious. For example, it takes discernment to accurately judge someone’s character. [dictionary.com]

All of us have been in a situation where we have lost trust in something (an institution) or someone. How we move forward from that experience is really important.

I have certainly been cynical, skeptical, and/or jaded at different points in my life. And when a certain action brings up a feeling I have felt before, I tend to try to discern what the situation is.

I don’t want to be stuck in one of those modes because it truly is against my general nature. However, there are unhealthy people and unhealthy systems out there. During our lives we are bound to run into a number of them.

They are even in the church!

I won’t get into all the details, but, I have been up close and personal in numerous situations where “people of God” were doing some ugly things.

And somehow, my faith in God’s goodness and purity and love was not damaged.

I am so thankful!

Of course, my faith and trust in people has been affected. So, pardon me if I don’t trust so easily.

Having experiences where you come out a bit cynical, skeptical, or jaded might serve to sharpen your discernment. As long as you don’t get stuck in those places it can help you have empathy when people are there.

Let God use all experiences to grow your faith and understanding.

Taking Risks

There are all kinds of “risks” we take every day. Some are rather large and others are so tiny (at least in our own minds) that we don’t think about it. Or, our desire for whatever is on the other side is so intense we don’t mind what it takes to get there.

A toddler who is learning how to walk falls down often and sometimes gets hurt. But they usually gain enough confidence or determination until they walk. Oh boy.

Then the running starts!

As parents we have to watch them figure it out — no matter how long it takes. It is good for them to learn how to do this on their own. Even though we don’t want heads bonking on the sidewalk or a tumble down the stairs, sometimes it happens. And since the little ones don’t know the risks, we have to anticipate them on their behalf.

Adults have the capacity to see the risks that young children, teenagers, and young adults don’t often see. That is the wisdom of experience. But, just because there are risks it doesn’t mean that the desired goal should not be targeted. And, just because someone is an adult does not mean they don’t take risks.

After all, risk is in the eye of the beholder!

My prayer is that you have wise counsel around you. That your inclination to participate in “risky business” is tempered with maturity and wisdom. And that you check in with God and His Word.

Enjoy, explore, and experience life. There are risks everywhere. We can’t live padded in bubble wrap. As long as what we are after doesn’t directly oppose God’s principles, we can go forward in confidence. Even though we might tumble and fall, we will likely come away with some wisdom on the other side of the experience!

Default Responses

If I am feeling off and then have what I consider a challenging conversation, you might find me responding in my “default” setting.

I would love to say my default response is grace, love, and soft like a little bunny but it isn’t always.

When I am feeling vulnerable, depleted, or unappreciated I may respond with some ugliness.

This is why it is so important for me to anchor my day with God. Remembering His love and provision for me and acknowledging His grace, mercy, forgiveness, and love. It doesn’t make my responses perfect. But, if I get too many days away from remembering His work in my life, I more easily switch into a default response.

Switching Seats

Have you ever been in a moment of deep frustration over how communication is going with someone?

I sure have! And, thankfully, I have a couple of people I can go to to share my relational dilemmas. I hope you have a few people like that in your life!

Recently, one of my people (Person A) was sharing one of their dilemmas. I have no connection to the person whose actions she was trying to understand (Person B). I think that helps. I am not neutral by any means, but I didn’t have a negative or positive idea about Person B.

As she described the scenario I was trying to think of a word picture to better understand the situation. I came up with one and shared it. As a verbal processor I couldn’t help myself. And, while my idea didn’t hit the mark, sharing it helped. Then I thought a little more about the situation — and really tried to “sit in the seat” of this other person and understand their actions.

Depending on our mood or how deeply we are intwined with a situation we might be able to “switch seats” and look at some potential perspectives of the “offending” party. But, sometimes we might benefit from some help from someone who is a little more neutral and can take a step back and try to look at the dynamics and come up with some possible scenarios. Sometimes “switching seats” will diffuse the situation enough that a calm conversation can happen.

As always, ask God to shed His light, perspective, and discernment on a difficult situation. If it is a very complex one you can also check in with a 3rd party who can be relatively neutral. And sometimes you will need a completely neutral 3rd party. You won’t go wrong if you seek to understand.

My big project

Would you take a moment out of your day today to pray for my big project?

I am hosting the Hungarian Heritage Expo for the second time. it is an online event for people who are excited about Hungarian heritage and culture. And it really is great fun.

We have some great presenters and it is so fun to work with them. And the speakers and I are working hard at promoting. I am flinging it out into the world and my prayer is the people who need to see it will see it.

We did one last year in July and it was a lot of work but it was also fun. I was definitely out of my comfort zone on parts of it but I still enjoyed it. And then it came time to create our catalog and I committed to doing it twice in 2025. Once is this week and the next one in August.

Had I not made that commitment in August to the people who receive the catalog, I surely would have forgotten how much fun the last Expo was and let it fall by the wayside. Or maybe only have done one, not two.

Now that I have the experience of the first one under my belt, it is much easier this go around. But it is also interesting how many of the processes and procedures I have forgotten about in the months since the last event. I am sure that will smooth out once I get my rhythm for the Expos down.

It seems I like things that require bursts of energy and intense focus and change up what can become routine. I think it is how I am wired because I seem to lean towards those things.

So, cheers to August 2024 Liz who committed to something and to March 2025 Liz for executing it. And a huge shout out to my husband, Don, who does endless editing for this event to happen! Please pray for the success of the Hungarian Heritage Expo!

I am so thankful that I am in a place in life where I can pursue these passion projects. My prayer is that it if it is an area I am meant to pursue that God makes it abundantly clear. Or, more importantly, that He gets my attention when I am going the wrong direction. Sometimes I am slow to see His signs. I always need His wisdom and discernment!

Deadlines

I am often a last minute person so I love a deadline. And I love to get really close to it. I get started and then that looming deadline gives me the momentum to power through.

I guess that is just how I am wired!

I still think I do my best work when I am backed into a corner. But as my own boss, I have to artificially create my own deadlines so I get projects done. When I say something out loud, I am committing to it.

PrayerPoints is also one of those things. I have committed to posting them every day during Lent and I do it. I have so many PrayerPoint devotions that I could have a little book of them. It’s hard to believe but 40 a year for 10+ years of anything adds up.

If God has planted an idea on your heart, consider telling one other person about it if that helps you to get motivated and start the the thing. Create your own deadlines or have a person who will help you in a loving (but firm) way to get on the path of what you are trying to accomplish.

And always pray for God to help you see the best way for you. I can bemoan that this is how I am or I can trust that God created me and loves me and will work with my personality or bent.

And He will delight to do the same for you!

By Situation

Sometimes you might notice that a lot of people in your world are struggling with similar things. Or there is something big happening in the world.

Present those people to God by situation.

You probably already do this. I mentioned yesterday that sometimes we drive by an accident and we have no idea who is involved. But you can be sure God does.

And when you know of big things happening in your community, state. country, or our world it is easy to think we have so little to offer. But I would like to challenge that. Of course, prayer is the first place we should turn to. Interceding for situations — whether they are within our reach are not — should always be our first step of action.

Then, as we bring the circumstances before God, He may give you ideas about how you can go beyond the intercession and contribute tangibly to the solution. Sometimes we are encouraged to take the next step and make a donation of money/goods or we might decide to volunteer for a day, a season, or a year. It’s hard to say. There are so many ways for us to serve. I believe God puts things on our hearts and then He is happy to help us discern our next moves.

As I think about bigger situations, and my goodness, there are a lot of them happening now with war and wildfires and outbreaks and so much division on so many levels.

I pray for the leadership of the bigger situations, whether or not I agree with them. I pray for God to work through the circumstances so people can see His provision and recognize God for who He is and to become aware of their contribution to the problem.

I pray for those who are decision makers to be humble and to really take stock in what they are doing (or not doing) for the good of the people.

And, I pray that those with their hands in the situation will have a moment where they really see God has loved them all along and that He desires for them to know the Truth.

What situations are heavy on your heart right now? Go straight to God with them — even if you don’t know what to say. I often will pray for peace – even though I have no idea what it will take for the circumstance to reach peace. God knows. And I know He has been working on it. He sees the much bigger picture. He sees these situations through the eyes of generations. I get glimpses of that when I read the Bible and see how many years people were in captivity and how many years they wandered in the dessert. Some things take a long time to come to fruition.

We are in a world that is full of sin and selfishness. My own included. Taking time to intercede for bigger situations helps me remember that life isn’t all about me. There is a bigger world out there that needs our prayers!

By Name

When I pray for people I like to pray for them by name.

Of course, if we come upon an accident, we typically don’t know who is involved. But God always knows so I know He fills in the gaps.

I start with my inner circle and say all the names, asking God to be with them and provide for them. And then I move to the outer circles and say their names as well. There are times I take shortcuts on the outer circles, depending on what is going on that might need more intentionality. For example, instead of naming everyone in Julie’s family, sometimes I say “Julie and her people.” The blessing on knowing and praying for a lot people is that it can take a lot of time. I don’t necessarily do all my praying at once. Sometime I get my inner core done and then I work through the others during the day. When someone comes to mind, I try not to just think about them but to also pray for them.

I can also pray for people and their situations, if I know it. But, of course, God always knows their situation. And that is a freedom for me. I can just say, “Lord, you know what _________ needs. Please bring that to them and make them aware of Your presence.” When I am praying to the One who created the people you are praying for it really opens things up for me. He knit them together. He desires a relationship with them. And He can use all the things in their life — good and difficult — to bring them to His saving grace. He knows exactly what they need even though I don’t.

How do you pray for your people?